There are many distractions that take away from learning, building relationships with others, and family time. The digital age brought more access to entertainment and ways to connect with the world through fast internet and new technology. It also brought an expectation that things need to happen immediately, thus causing an inability to stay focused and attentive on things that are not immediate. There are some ways for you, as a parent, to help your child work on focus and attention skills to aid in the learning process.
Teach them patience and to better understand real-life expectations.
With same-day delivery and instant connections anywhere online, kids’ views of real expectations are quite skewed, and they really don’t have much concept of how long it takes for things to happen. It is important to make the experience of learning about patience a positive one for children, especially when children are young, as they do not understand the concept of time as well as older children.
This may lead to children repeatedly asking about what time things may occur, such as snack time or playtime. As parents, it is important to remember to stay calm and positive while they ask and wait. This reinforces that waiting can be a positive experience. Find productive and engaging ways for your child to understand the time they need to wait and to keep it a positive experience. When your child is expecting and waiting for something, keep your promises and give an accurate answer when they ask how much longer. Answer your child with information to their questions about wait time. You can use creative ways to answer using measurements that help bring numbers and time increments into understandable expressions for your child. For example, it will take a school days’ worth of time to arrive at the hotel. When possible, use visualizations or a countdown to help your child understand the wait time. It gives them something tangible to focus on during the wait and helps them to understand the reality of how long things in life take and that we must wait and be patient.
During homework time, you can practice the focus and attention skills with your child that will help them at school. First, remove all distractions from the area set up for your child to do homework. Next, provide them with attention breaks. Set a specific time for homework (30 minutes or 1 hour), then split it into increments (such as 15 minutes) for each subject (adjust appropriately for child’s age), and then set up a time or alarm that will indicate when the time is up for that subject. At that point, give them a break to move around and release any extra energy. You can do this in fun ways like physical activities, a dance break, or a game. Try to avoid using screens/electronic devices for the attention break as that can lead to more distractions for the next subject time period.
Depending on how much homework your child has to complete, there could be multiple breaks put into homework time. When it comes to chores or other responsibilities for your child, you can use the same method. Break down each task into smaller pieces and time intervals, then provide them with a timer or alarm, and then provide breaks to do something else. Limit the directions for chores to one or two for each time interval, depending on the age group. Instead of using screens/electronic devices during any breaks, try using focus or fidget tools like stress balls, toys that allow the child to stretch or manipulate them, bouncy balls, magnet drawing pads, and pipe cleaners. If your child loses focus during the homework time interval, redirect their attention back to the homework using positive feedback. Also, reward all of your child’s positive behaviors when they are completing a task. The more positive reinforcement used for the behaviors that help with focus and attention, the more likely it will be to promote those behaviors to be used in all settings.
You can work with your child on learning mindfulness
This is about being more aware of your surroundings, feelings, and body. Mindfulness exercises are about focusing and paying attention. Some examples of mindfulness exercises include:
· Deep breathing
· Meditation
· Yoga
· Taking a mindful walk
There are guided meditations for kids of all ages on YouTube. When you are practicing mindfulness with your child, you can ask them to answer questions while they are sitting calmly. For example:
· What do you hear?
· What can you see around you?
· How does your body feel against the chair or floor?
· How do your feet feel in socks or shoes?
· What can you taste?
· What do you smell?
· What thoughts pop into your mind as you sit here quietly?
· What feelings do you feel right now?
Mindfulness exercises are a great way to build focus skills and spend time with family. It can also help with interactions with others by improving a child’s awareness of others’ feelings and their surroundings. You can also build memory games into family activities to continue practicing focus and attention while they build closer relationships with their family members.
Some children might need more than practice focusing and paying attention.
There is a difference between a child that has some focus and attention issues and a child who is diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) or ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is a complex neurodevelopmental disorder that can affect a child’s success at school, as well as their relationships”i. Many of the symptoms can be experienced by children, so your child will need to be evaluated for a diagnosisii. Here is a list of common symptoms for ADHD:
· Self-focused behavior
· Interrupting
· Trouble waiting their turn
· Emotional turmoil
· Fidgeting
· Problems with playing quietly
· Unfinished tasks
· Loss of focus
· Avoidance of tasks needing extended mental effort
· Mistakes
· Daydreaming
· Trouble getting organized
· Forgetfulness
· Symptoms in multiple settingsiii.
If your child is exhibiting these symptoms and it is causing issues with school and at home, then you should speak with your pediatrician about an evaluation to determine if a diagnosis of ADHD or ADD is warranted. Fortunately, both ADHD and ADD are treatable through cognitive behavioral therapy and medication, to name a couple. Most young children will exhibit some of these symptoms until they learn patience and the concept of time. You will only need to seek evaluation if it is affecting your child’s learning and relationships.
Overall, you can help your child with focus and attention for learning and everyday use. Making the learning positive and fun, especially if you practice with your family, can solidify the focus and attention skills in your child. If your child shows signs of ADHD or ADD and it is affecting school/home, please speak with your pediatrician about an evaluation. For children who are not showing all signs or it is not affecting much at school/home, then you can work with them at home on their focus and attention. By learning patience, understanding time expectations, working in smaller time increments and having breaks, and learning mindfulness, your child can help their learning process, improve their interactions and relationships with others, and enjoy more time with family.
Sources:
Legg, T. & Healthline Editorial Team. (February 19, 2020). 14 Signs of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/signs#takeaway